In a Moment - Issue 30

In the midst of all the closing of last year,

closing of offices,

closing of businesses,

closing of faces, covered in masks

there was also an opening.

A veil was lifted.

The heavy curtain that often obscured the impermanence of all things lifted.

I found myself, like so many, confronted with the reality that I have no control. The things I've held as constants could fall away in a moment. Realizing there is no guarantee that things will go as planned.

And that was a lot to take in.

I had already been exposed to this concept of impermanence years earlier. Granted, I pushed it away immediately upon first reading about it. Not wanting to accept that I did not control my fate. The project manager within me rebelled against the reality that I cannot control every outcome.

In the past year, I have come to appreciate this reality. I find that I take time to relish in a good moment — noticing the beauty of the light in the early evening as it illuminates buildings in its golden glow. And I recognize that the bad moments are temporary, they will swell and recede back, just as waves move through the ocean.

The other day a good friend was in town and reached out to see if I could meet up that evening. Pre-pandemic, I would have likely replied with a familiar response, “Oh I’d love to, but I’m pretty busy with work this week. Maybe we could try for another night?” And the other night might materialize or it might slip into one of those intended meet-ups that never seems to sync. However, when I received this invitation, living with the veil lifted, I replied with an immediate “Yes!”

As we all continue to emerge and start to form some new sense of normal. I watch as the curtain tries to descend again. I see as it gets caught on the reality that life is short, precious, and unpredictable. I choose to keep the curtain lifted. To see how I can be present and appreciate each moment as it passes.

To move to a place of living for the present, rather than tomorrow.

To move into a mode of saying “yes,” rather than “next time.”