Zooming in and Zooming out
I join a group for meditation practice most mornings on Zoom. This is a community that formed early in 2020 and includes people from all over the country and the world. We join from our living rooms and home offices, our porches, and, at times, in cars.
The other morning one of the members of the community asked a question following the practice. They shared how they found their mind very active with thoughts surrounding the violence unfolding in Israel and Gaza. At the beginning of the practice, they experienced anxious feelings and racing thoughts but found as the practice continued, a sense of ease surfaced. As the meditation practice drew to a close, the feeling of anxiety resumed, and they found themselves anticipating the "return" to the experience of day-to-day life. They noted how the practice had become an escape from the realities of what was happening in the world. However, they didn't want to use the practice in this way. They asked, how to approach the practice without using it as a means to escape.
The teacher listened intently and asked, "How might you not use the practice in this way?"
The participant paused for a moment, "Well, I suppose it allows me to hold all that is going on."
This reflection has stayed with me for the last few days. Reverberating throughout my being.
As a facilitator and practitioner of meditation and mindful movement, I've often encountered this challenge. Of how the practice can become an escape. A moment to tune out. A way to check out from all that's going on.
However, I find it's possible to take refuge in these practices without tapping out by zooming in and zooming out.
When I first sit for meditation or start a movement practice, I notice my awareness is often quite zoomed in. Thoughts are racing around based on the latest headlines or planning my next few hours, or I notice sensations like the pain in my lower back or the stiffness in my knees. Through the space of practice, I find I'm able to zoom out a bit. To begin to notice not only the things that are most immediately present but I’m can broaden my awareness to take in the entirety of the body, or note elements of the environment I'm occupying. It is in these moments the breadth of awareness reveals itself.
You see, awareness is boundless.
When I was navigating the acute grief following the death of my father several years ago, I would often walk to the water. I found respite in the presence of expansive water. I found ease being near something that felt vast enough to hold all the feelings that were surfacing for me.
And I find that awareness is much like the limitless ocean or a seemingly endless prairie. Awareness reflects our ability to hold much more than we realize we are capable of. And it also allows us to create space around things that might be painful or difficult.
It’s through this gentle zooming in and zooming out that we can be with all that is arising without zoning out. We can reveal all that we are processing. And from there, we understand the ways in which we might need to be tender with ourselves or unearth a need for support. Through practice, we're able to identify those soft spots, and with that knowledge, hopefully, we can move through the world in a more conscious and attentive way.
While sitting on a cushion or resting in a reclined position might feel like we're not doing much in response to all that is going on, it can be a way for us to understand how we feel about what's going on so that we're less reactive as we move through our day-to-day life. It becomes a way for us to ensure that we're not creating more harm or adding to the chaos of the current environment. If we discover we are especially sensitive one day, we might offer ourselves a bit more space and kindness.
These practices are not about opting out or zoning out; they're about drawing close to what is present. To be with the thoughts, emotions, and feelings and make choices from a more mindful and intentional place.
The current events can feel disempowering and helpless, but I believe there is power in every interaction. By meeting someone with compassion, we are able to impact the trajectory of their day. It's through these little ripples that small changes can occur. And these small changes build upon one another to create larger shifts.
And so perhaps you take some time to pause, to zoom in to see what is most present for you, as well as zoom out to consider your impact on all of those around you.